Thursday, 2 February 2012

Trying to make sense of intense loss- a prayer for my cousin and his wife

This post is being written through blinding tears, so may not be too coherent.

Earlier this week at about midnight my cousin and his wife found that their darling 3 month old baby girl had passed away in her cot- suddenly and inexpicably.

When I saw them later that day I found myself unable to approach them. What did one say in the face of such overwhelming gut-wrenching grief?

I only saw my cousin's wife (the baby's mother) briefly. I was in awe of her composure at that moment (although I realise I was only seeing her for a brief moment). I was pushed by my aunt to greet my cousin. His face revealed his shock and anguish. I hugged him and babbled, "I don't know what to say" repeatedly, inadequately- but truthfully. I didn't know what to say in the face of such intense agony.

Actually, I knew all the right things to say. I know everything which THEORETICALLY should grant one comfort. But nothing I could say could take away their pain. I wished so much that there was a way to relieve their pain.

Yesterday his Facebook status read: "a part of me died yesterday...the pain is indescribable. the Imam said she will intercede for us to enter Jannah and she's waiting for us there. Oh Allah pls grant me the strength of Iman to meet her there and relieve this pain Insha-Allah..."

It brought me to tears- and so many others, I'm sure. I still can't read it without weeping.

I was in awe of the strength of his faith and the fact that he was deriving some comfort from his hope of meeting his baby again in Jannah (heaven).

In our religion, we believe that God tests those whom He loves  (which is why the prophets had endured such trials). He then rewards them abundantly and increases His mercy toward them when they maintain faith and turn toward Him in these times of affliction. I pray that my cousin and his wife are able to derive comfort from their belief in God's increased love and mercy, which have been promised to them as a result of their affliction.

I pray that Allah/God eases their pain (and that of the baby's sister, grandparents and others who had been close to her) and grants them the strength to get through this period of sorrow and bereavement, Insha-Allah (God-willing)

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