Soothing sensual massage

There are certain activities in which I find it very difficult to involve my husband, Mo. They include watching romantic comedies, enjoying re-runs of my favourite sitcom ever, F.R.I.E.N.D.S., washing dishes and giving me massages.

Asking him to give me a massage is by far the best way to get rid of him. His reaction includes a widening of the eyes accompanied by the soundless movement of his lips; as he formulates his excuse, which is usually something like "let me just see if I locked the car", or “I think I forgot the baby in the car”, promising to return to grant my request. He never does.

I often suffer from tension in my neck and shoulders, which is why he took it upon himself to pop in at the little Chinese massage cubicle in Canal Walk mall to make an appointment on my behalf. I refused to let him off the hook that easily.
When I complain about his reluctance to massage me, his response is, "I was thinking- you deserve a day at a luxury spa- let me rather make an appointment for you, so as to ensure that you get the best massage possible". This has never materialised.

One morning I awoke feeling particularly tense after a terrible night with baby. I decided to put my foot down. I called him at work, and said that I would not accept any further excuses- he would grant my wish when he got home and that was that.

Much to my surprised, he obliged, saying that he would grant my wish- but only if I would allow him to use a unique new-age method, the details of which he would email me.
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He got the idea from the methods used at the Ada Barak's spa in the town of Talmei Elazar in Israel where they use small snakes for places like the face for a lighter massage and bigger snakes for the deep tissue massage.

Needless to say, he managed to slither his way out of it again.