Anticipating the results of weeks of hard work

For the past 3 weeks we've been caught up in a flurry of school-related activities. The older kids were bombarded with projects and tests, which usually have me all stressed out and grumpy.

Strangely, this time, I actually enjoyed most of it. I thoroughly enjoyed preparing the kids for their tests and it seemed that the less they knew at the beginning of their study sessions, the happier I was - because it enabled me to live out my 'homeschooling mum' fantasy, which I don't think will die very soon. This term Shakeel (14) worked quite well on his own - for the most part. He'd ask for help here and there, but I was happy to see that the study methods which we'd used over the years (when I used to work more closely with him) are standing him in good stead and allowing him to cover the bulk of the work without my assistance. 

Shakeel working on a project with his friend and classmate

Making time to play with one of his lovebirds

Working with Tharaa (11), on the other hand, took up the bulk of my time, energy and patience. In the previous post I mentioned how I would no longer write about my kids in a way that could embarrass or upset them when they read the post later on, so I'll just say that Tharaa and I had some challenging moments, but thank goodness, that's all behind us now. On the one hand I was alarmed to see that, a few days before her tests, she often did not even understand the typed handouts in her book (upon which all the tests were based). I am not one to automatically blame the teacher, as it is possible that she was not paying attention as she should have been. What was so alarming was the fact that she had achieved the top scores across the entire sixth grade during the first term, yet now, a few months later, she was completely baffled by the contents of her books. It also didn't help that the school's talent show, in which she sang and for which she had practised so hard, took place the night before she was scheduled to write History and Maths!!! 

Like I said earlier, although I was alarmed at the fact that she was so unprepared for her tests, I was thrilled to have this clean slate upon which to practice my teaching skills (because, really, she was a clean slate - it was as if she was seeing the work for the first time!) But I enjoyed it and she responded well. Maths required much revision of the basics and I let her use the invaluable khanacademy.org to brush up on her newly acquired skills. For the other learning areas (History, Geography and Natural Science) I firstly familiarised myself with her typed notes and textbooks, after which I set about explaining it to her. She grasped concepts instantly and answered questions accurately - which has me absolutely baffled as to why she did not know what was happening in any of these subjects when we started studying. After all, the study period is supposed to serve merely to refresh one's memory and consolidate that which one has already learned - especially at Grade 6 level. But, my concerns were outweighed by my own silent glee and pride (in myself) each time she yelled out, " NOW I understand!"  once I'd explained a section of work. (Yes, I know - I really need to get a hobby - or a job).

Written by Tharaa - dedicated to her best friends

Tharaa hard at work

Projects were an entirely different story. Her Natural Science project involved making an electric circuit using a battery, conducting wires and 2 output components (a buzzer and a light). They were required to construct a game using the circuit which would result on the buzzer or light being activated by the flow of the current. Although I understood that the game should involve closing a break in the circuit allowing the current to flow from the input component (the battery) which would then activate the buzzer and light, I had no idea how this would be done. Fortunately this type of challenge is what gets Mo (her dad)'s juices flowing, so together they built a game which earned a her 100%. 

Although I am happy with her result, I have a HUGE problem with this type of project, which clearly requires heavy reliance on an adult. Although I agree that parents should be involved in kids' education, what does this type of project mean for children of parents who have absolutely no education? Tharaa told us about a girl in her class being raised by a single mum, who submitted a cell attached to a light bulb, which sadly did not work. This girl only managed to get 30% for her and her mum's efforts. Why should children's grades depend on their parents' abilities and educational level? One thing is for certain - if I were the only one guiding Tharaa through this project, my daughter would have achieved far less than her friend's 30%. Why should the fact that my daughter had McGuyver to guide her, stand her in better stead than her friend whose parent's skills do not extend to building circuits. This project, in no way, reflected the ability of the kids to build circuits or even on their own understanding of their workings. 

So after much explaining, pain, confusion; followed by small moments of sweet victory, Tharaa's tests eventually ended. 

With the older kids' assessments and Aisha (3)'s new bout of unexplained tantrums, poor Nuha (8) once again fell through the cracks. I know that she too was busy with formal assessments, but I had very little time left to help her. She was preparing a project and an oral on solar systems, when - upon giving it a quick once-over (which, sadly is how I check her work most of the time) I came across words like "interstellar" and "centaurs",  which forced me to take time out to explain the concept of plagiarism and how one cannot simply copy huge chunks of information from Wikipedia. I got her to read each paragraph to me and then explain it in her own words before writing it down on her poster. This also made memorising the information much easier as she understood the concepts quite well. I really have to get the older kids to work more independently so that I can spend more time with my patient and understanding daughter. 

In addition to me neglecting Nuha's studies during the assessment period, I'd very often rely on the poor angel to keep Aisha busy so that I can focus on the heavy workload of the older kids. 

My most independent child (not by choice, poor thing)

Aisha, in the meantime, apart from throwing the most frightening tantrums at the drop of a hat, is also busy practising for her school concert. To maintain the element of surprise, parents are being kept in the dark about the performances, but I'm told that she surprises her teachers each time by coming out of her shell completely when the music starts and then proceeding to shake her booty shamelessly. 

So now we eagerly await the assessment results which we'll receive at the end of the school term (in 2 weeks time). We are also really excited about watching Aisha's very first concert this Saturday. The following few weeks therefore promise to be really exciting for our family as we reap the rewards (hopefully) of many weeks of hard work. Let's pray that it all pays off.

To blog or not to blog -that is the question.

I started this blog about 2 years ago to give expression to my thoughts and feelings and, more importantly, to keep a record of events and special moments in the lives of our kids. I wanted to capture and savour as much as possible about their childhoods because at that time already, I was becoming acutely and painfully aware of how rapidly they were growing up and changing.

In addition, my inability to answer questions like, "Mommy, at what age did I start walking?" (due to my awful memory) prompted me to try to find ways of recording the significant events of their lives - and woe betide me if I'd remember the details of one child and forget those of another. I'd then have to deal with accusations of "This just goes to show - you love So-and-so more than you love me!" No amount of explaining or truth (that their mother is just a sieve brain who never recovers from the compounding effects of the porridge-brain phenomenon from which she suffers with each pregnancy) - no such explanation convinces them that the reason I am unable to remember every little detail about their formative years is anything other than the fact that I just don't love them enough.

Then there is the issue of lost pictures. Oh, thinking about this does cause me pain - especially of the fact that my poor poor Nuha (8) - who finds herself stuck (in age) between two outspoken and demanding older siblings and a tantrum-throwing and, even more demanding baby sister - only has about two baby photos to show of her cute chubby adorable first 2 years. The reason for this is that the older 2 were born at a time before digital cameras became widely used, so all their pictures are carefully stored in albums and picture frames. Then, in 2004, Nuha's birth coincided with our purchase of all sorts of digital technology, allowing us to take hundreds of pictures of our precious little newcomer. But, sadly, thanks to a burglary a few years ago, which saw our laptop and video camera being snatched from our home in broad daylight, all our baby pictures of Nuha were lost. Upon little Aisha (3)'s arrival, we'd learned our lesson (sort of) and we are trying to back up copies of our precious memories.

But I have not been doing too well with uploading our precious memories onto the Google Drive. It is time consuming and tedious, especially due to the sheer volume of the pictures I consider to be important. (I'm the mommy who uploads 8 pictures of her child doing exactly the same thing in almost exactly the same pose for fear of not capturing an important moment in his/her life).

So that's where blogging came in. I was able to capture significant and seemingly insignificant moments using pictures and then providing context to these pictures through the use of words. Going back into my blog archives recently, I was overcome with nostalgia and joy, as I came across events which hold no particular significance whatsoever and about which I would most definitely have forgotten had I not recorded their detail. But despite their insignificance, these events had brought us joy and, therefore, just looking through those posts made me happy.

Shuffling with Maama

Kite making with paper and party streamers

The day our pet bird flew away

Drive out to Paarl

Not forgetting the tantrums

Nor forgetting our other babies

Aisha checking out her new school 

Sibling cuddly time

This reminds me - I should hide my lipstick!

Random morning visit to Mouille Point

Early potty training days (on our Paarl visit)

Girls day out with my two older girls

Another Sunday afternoon at Deer Park

And just another day at Sea Point Park

At Eastern Food Bazaar

Expecting a visit from the Tooth Fairy

Grade 7 (sporting his prefect and library monitor badges) - oh, my heart aches - I can't believe that this was a year ago - he's grown up so much since then.  Boo-hoo!!!

Impromptu midweek after-school visit to Du Kloof  Resort

Chilly Sunday at Hout Bay

Snapping away pics on her toy phone

Looking back on these seemingly insignificant moments made me smile. And cry. But mainly, I am overwhelmed with gratitude for the little moments we shared. 

And that is the purpose I want this blog to serve for my kids as well. I want them to look back to the morning we went to Sea Point, which - although  it was a morning like so many others - its memory will bring them so much joy as they are able to reminisce about the special moments they shared and especially about the amazing bond they had (which God-willing, will never be lessened).

But in recent months, I've found blogging to be more difficult. My kids are growing up and, sadly, are becoming more self-conscious in many ways. Shakeel (14) will no longer run around in a park with free abandon - he will first look around to see who is looking. This saddens me, but this where he is in his journey into adolescence and I should respect that. It is for this reason that I am becoming increasingly conscious of what I write - I constantly have to consider how the information I share on my blog will affect not only him, but also his sisters when they reach this stage in their development. Perhaps this is the type of sensitivity I should have been showing them all along. After all, I have been exposing much of their lives - good and bad - for all on the interweb to see.

But where does this leave me - and this blog? I find that having to censor my posts makes writing more difficult for me. Previously my thoughts and feelings would just flow as I typed whatever entered my head (and heart). Now, having to exercise some sort of sifting process, I am finding writing about my family to be more difficult - which is a problem for this blog, since they are its main focus.

But l love blogging. I love the feeling of finishing a post of which I am proud. I love that it makes me look at the world in a different way - especially when I have my camera with me. Ordinary moments are transformed into the extraordinary. I pay attention to little details in my children's lives, which evokes in me feelings of gratitude for every small moment. It prevents days, weeks and months from passing by without the tiny seemingly insignificant moments being acknowledged and appreciated.

So, through writing this post, I've just decided - I shall continue with this blog (while paying heed to how its content affects my kids); the doubts and uncertainties which I felt a few minutes ago have been allayed through me having processed my thoughts and feelings right here in this post - which, once again, reminds me of how important this blog is to me.

Nuha's turn to receive a prize for "Fasting for the love of Allah"

Every year, for the past 14 years, the Islamic Unity Convention holds an award ceremony for those people who succeeded in fasting for the entire month of Ramadaan FOR THEIR VERY FIRST TIME. The men, women and children participating in this event, which is known as "Fasting for the Love of Allah", receive a certificate, a medal and a goodie-bag as small tokens of recognition for the accomplishment of this remarkable feat.

Last year Nuha (8) fasted for the entire month of Ramadaan for the first time. She however did not want to have her achievements acknowledged at this event, as she was too shy to go up to receive her award. This year however, for some reason, she built up the courage to claim her prize belatedly. This could very well have had something to do with the fact that her darling cousin, F. too was participating in this event and that spending the morning with her sidekick while they stuffed their faces with the delicious contents of their goodie-bag prizes, was well worth the unwanted attention she'd have to endure in going up to collect her prize once her name was called.

The event was lovely and there were some touching moments as the new Muslims' (especially the adults) names were called. The Imam (I forgot his name unfortunately) emphasised that although parents might sneak their little darlings small gifts to show pride at their accomplishments (fasting) and despite the fact that prizes were being awarded at this event for those who fasted for the first time, it has to be emphasised that Muslims fast 'for the love of Allah'.

Imam Achmad Cassiem voiced his displeasure at the use of the word 'revert' to describe people who had just embraced Islam. He said that once they took their Shahada, they became Muslims (like any other) and that giving them any other label implied that they were on some sort of probation before they became Muslims.

He also cautioned people against the use of the term non-Muslim, likening it to the use of the inherently biased term 'non-white' during apartheid. 

Here are some pics of Nuha and her darling cousin receiving their prizes (the pics were taken with my phone with my very shaky hand, so the quality leaves much to be desired)

And here we have my mum and my niece, anxiously awaiting little F's turn

But before I get into trouble for having done a special blog post on Nuha's turn at this event, I'd better show you a photo taken 2 years ago when Tharaa (then aged 9) took to the stage at the same event